President Trump announced today that he was uninviting Mexican President Enrique Pena Nieto to his birthday party, hours after the Mexican President already said he wasn’t attending.

A former State Department official said, “Mexico’s President has attended the American President’s birthday party going back generations.  For him to decline the invitation this year sends a strong signal of his dissatisfaction with the Trump administration’s agenda.”

A source within the White House said, “Once we learned that the Mexican President wasn’t going to attend President Trump’s birthday party, we had to act fast,  First, pretending that we didn’t want him to attend in the first place.  And second, to find someone else to bring the guacamole.”

Meanwhile, President Trump decided to take out his anger on the many poor working Americans who elected him in the first place, proposing a 20% tariff on all imported Mexican products.  American retailers quickly assured their shareholders that the additional expense would not impact their bottom line as the entire 20% cost would be passed on to consumers, and disproportionally impact poorer Americans.

One Trump supporter interviewed on the way out of the grocery store said, “Mexico is going to pay for skipping President Trump’s birthday party…and they are going to pay big- 20%!  Hey, wait a minute, why is my grocery bill 20% higher?”

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